Althouse writes, "If you are in shorts, you are not a man." Pfft! Ann, you've got two strikes against you:
1. You are a woman. Real men don't let women define manhood -- that's how we got metrosexuals. Any "man" who takes fashion advice from a woman (except one to whom he is married -- dating doesn't count) or a Queer-Eye-wannabe is not a man. [Imagine, if you will, a Bizarro world in which women take fashion advice from men, and there is a TV show in which lesbians give fashion advice to straight women. Not lipstick lesbians -- really butch ones. Frightening for everyone not heavily invested in denim and plaid.]
2. You live in Wisconsin. Awfully big talk for Wisconsin. When I lived in Michigan and Indiana, I only wore shorts indoors. In fact, I can't recall ever wearing them outside, feeling that they were beneath my dignity. Now that I live in the South, it's another story. I wear shorts outdoors into late October. On the other hand, I don't wear winter coats (even though everyone else around here does). Wearing a winter coat this far south is beneath my dignity.
Now that I've offended everyone out there, from Northerners to Southerners to straight women to metrosexuals to lesbians to plaid manufacturers, I'm going to put on shorts, crack open a beer, and watch Mythbusters. Or maybe I'll rev up that new hammer drill I just bought, and punch some holes in some masonry. Or maybe I'll just nap on the sofa.